Life seems to have come to a screeching halt after love ended. I’ve been staring at this wall of uncertainty for ever now; expecting that “invisible” turn which people say exists to turn visible for me. I desperately need to move my hands and legs. Take the turn and continue my life. Its not that I wish to be like this. Its as I explained to all my close ones (people who keep trying to help me out) my heart just wanders off. Its not that I am trying to think of her or the gorgeous seconds we spent, apparently as a pair in endless love. Thoughts flow and then I just cant stop myself from pitying myself. Self pity sucks! I know. I really want to help myself, its just that I’m waiting. I know that I’m probably sounding like a lovestruck fool with all heart and no brain, but thats incorrect again. The heart depends on the brain for flashbacks, you know?
For you, luvey:
Find a guy who calls you beautiful instead of hot, who calls you back
when you hang up on him, who will stay awake just to watch you sleep.
Wait for the guy who kisses your forhead, who wants to show you off to
the world when you are in your sweats, who holds your hand in front of
his friends, Wait for the one who is constantly reminding you of how
much he cares about you and how lucky he is to have you. Wait for the
one who turns to his friends and says, “…that’s her.”
So, she is gone and I’ve quit running. R.I.P love I don’t want you to ever happen to me again! I also know that I must stop writing about love, her and other things related to her on this blog, its high time that I wrote about more productive stuff, like technology. I really want to do that. Write about something which has meat in it. I’m going to try and do that, but not now. I think its high time I went into hibernation for a few days, weeks, months… hope it doesn’t grow into years! Anyway, its time for a hiatus. I’ll be back, later, maybe!
And I thought about it again, going away and not writing that is! Do I really need to do all this? Trouble myself for no apparent fault of mine? I’ve sulked enough and seriously, I don’t feel half as bad as what I used to, like maybe 2 weeks ago! So, probably all I need is time and I’ll get there. I’m going to hang on tight and let myself continue downhill for some time more. I’m sure and ohhh, I assure you’ll – all you guys who love me and have been with me throughout, that I’ll climb back again and I’m sure that I’ll do well. Infact, much better. I’ll surely write more regularly and yes, I will complete that section on people very soon. Promise.
-Anup
P.S: I found Faith. And ohh, Maroon 5 is nice.